Oh… the tabloids are just boiling with rumors about Tiger Woods. If you take all the worst rumors and accept them as true, here’s what’s going on:
Tiger has been having a steamy affair with a hot New York socialite who has followed him to Australia to be with him. Of course Tiger’s wife Elin just gave birth to their second kid about nine months ago, so she’s sitting home reading about this in the tabloids…
Sometime after Thanksgiving dinner, around 2:30 am, they got into a heated argument, Elin scratched his face up, whereupon Tiger fled from the house with Elin in hot pursuit with a golf club. At some point the club made contact with Tiger’s cranium, knocking him a bit loopy, but not too loopy to get into his Cadillac, but too loopy to drive it, whereupon Tiger backed into a fire hydrant while Elin smashed in the back window and a side window, and then crashed into a neighbor’s tree. At some point Elin managed to gain control of herself, realized that Tiger was actually hurt and called 911.
By the time the police and ambulance got there, Tiger was in and out of consciousness, a state consistent with suffering a concussion.
Now we don’t know what really happened, and I’m inclined to give Tiger the benefit of the doubt but it is a very strange story. The “official” story Tiger told the police about Elin breaking out the back window of the Cadillac with a golf club to get Tiger out of the car is rather comically implausible, which just leads to more speculation.
Tiger has withdrawn from his own tournament next weekend. I doubt we’ll ever hear what actually happened, but I have to admit, the vision of an enraged Nordic supermodel chasing Tiger Woods out of the house with a 3 wood is alarming, but has an element of humor in it.
The best joke I’ve heard from this so far is “What’s the difference between a Cadiallac and a Wedge? Tiger Woods can back up a wedge.”
9 users commented in " Tiger, Tiger, Tiger…. "
Follow-up comment rss or Leave a TrackbackIt does seem that Tiger has been dabbling with another woman.
If it is true that Elin had hit Tiger, scratched him, or any other physical abusive contact, she can be brought up on charges even without Tiger filing a complaint.
I think there could be some truth to Tiger having an affair, Elin and he fighting and now he is trying to protect her from jail. Probably this is also to protect him from divorce court.
There’s something fishy for sure. If Tiger has been on some pain medication from his surgery and rehabilitation last year, there could be a potential Rush Limbaugh sort of thing he’s trying to hide too. Which would be really sad.
My guess is that he at least has been inappropriately behaving with another woman and Elin may well have kicked him out of the house while he was loopy from pain medication and that’s why he couldn’t back up the car.
There are rumors that a prosecutor is seeking a subpoena for Tiger’s medical results, and if they find pain killer, they’ll no doubt subpoena any prescription info, and ask for a search warrant for his house.
Sad all the way around. I like Tiger, and I hope he’s not fooling around. It’s unfortunate but I see a lot of stories about powerful, desirable men fooling around after their wives give birth and don’t feel much like catering to their husband’s desires for a while. It’s much more common than we’d like to think for a man to roam while his wife is tending the newborn infant at home.
And someone like Tiger is probably swimming in a sea of readily available females all the time.
It’s probably good for me that I’m poor, unknown, bald, pudgy and generally unattractive.
Not to make fun of Tiger in his time of trouble, but I ran across some funnies.
“Tiger Woods is so rich that he owns lots of expensive cars. Now he has a hole in one.
What’s the difference between a car and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards.
Tiger Woods wasn’t seriously injured in the crash, but he’s still below par.
What were Tiger Woods and his wife doing out at 2.30 in the morning? They went clubbing.
Tiger Woods crashed into a fire hydrant and a tree. He couldn’t decide between a wood and an iron.”
Heh… now women are coming out of the woodwork saying they’ve had hot affairs with Tiger. Some claim to have voice mails from Tiger.
Not sure if this is hurting Tiger or not in the long run. Sure it hurts his image as a boring family guy, but a guy that can juggle a dozen hot sex-crazed socialites while still beating the crap out of his golf opponents? That’s legendary stuff man…
Well Cosmic, as long as I tried to play even halfway decent golf, and failed…
When I saw that ad many years ago with Tiger bouncing a golf ball off of an iron, and then smacking it about a million yards down the fairway…well…I figured he was a true multi-tasker, with a brain wired to “juggle” a whole lot at once.
Tiger is a “living legend” for sure. Honestly, I hope that most of the garbage being reported is just that. But, ya’ never know. I guess I’m just a simple guy, and one extremely hot chick (a brunette) is enough to occupy me. Heh! Maybe that’s his problem…he married a blond.
When ever a celebrity is accused of cheating on his wife a number of people come out and claim they had affairs with them.
What strikes me as phony is the one claiming to have over 300 text messages. The reason is how could they be stored? That just doesn’t ring true to me at all, and is far to easy to fudge.
This same one claims to have voicemail messages from him. This too is easy to forge even if it wouldn’t stand up in court.
I view this as some bimbo looking to get some kind of notoriety or money or sick thrill out this.
Sure it very possible that he had an affair, or multiple affairs. The thing is how do you prove you didn’t if its not true?
Far too many “ladies” are fine with sullying their reputations by making claims such as this. Decades ago it was mortification if news of an affair came out, now its some sort of weird badge of honor.
It seems Tiger is guilty of straying from his wife. He has posted an apology and stayed away from any details.
I still have doubts about some of the claims that are now coming out, but it does seem like the Tiger has been stalking fresher fruits.
Sad to hear this, but not completely surprised. Having as much resources as he has, along with opportunity from being on the road, along with plenty of women who throw themselves at any celebrity figures, it seems Tiger wasn’t strong enough mentally to cope with it.
These sorts of stories always amaze me. Based on Tiger’s statement, I suspect that more than one of the women claiming to have teed off with Tiger probably carried his club in their bag a few times.
I’ve never really understood the mindset of those who have affairs. Nor do I understand the reasoning of those who have affairs with married men or women. I’ve had to more or less conclude that it’s a fundamentally narcissistic thing to do, because it should be obvious on the first approximation that if you got bored with your wife, you’ll get bored with your mistress too. And if your mistress will cheat WITH you, she’ll cheat ON you. It’s just a whole rats nest of emotional pitfalls and has never seemed to me to be worth the risk these people are taking. Why would you claim to love someone and then put them into that much suffering?
I just don’t get it. Never have.
Cosmic, I don’t get it either.
Maybe its about ego, thinking that they are so great that they will never be cheated on. How would you ever really trust someone who conspired to cheat with you? It means they are deceptive and sooner or later it will be against you.
I couldn’t ever do that to my wife, despite the disagreements and fights over the years, along with the temptations, it just isn’t worth the cost. That isn’t just the divorce possibility, its the betrayal.
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